From self-contemplation to acceptance: Eight tips from real women on achieving self-love ♥️

We’re starting a campaign among women to start loving, accepting, and owning their own damn selves!

When was the last time you told yourself that you were beautiful no matter what? No “only ifs”, no buts, no strings attached.

Chances are that if you’re a woman, you probably don’t remember. If you do then kudos to you, you have to give us your tips for achieving that!

The art of self-love is a tricky one to master. It's hard, frustrating and really requires us to dig deep within ourselves to even kinda sorta get there. It’s also not a one-time, ‘let's bang this out’ kind of thing but instead something that needs to be worked on every single day. While the initial step may be difficult, the rewards for our confidence, mental health, overall success and happiness are definitely more than worth it.

In order to make this journey less daunting, we spoke to some amazing women on various stages of their self-love journey and the answers we came back with were reassuring, practical and full of encouragement.

Here are their eight tips on how you can start your own self-love journey :)

1. Do a SWOT analysis of yourself

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“Observe where you are in life, how your relationships are, health is, emotions are and observe what gives you joy and what are the patterns then.”
- Nisha Gupta 

A SWOT analysis is a tried and tested method to identify internal Strength, Weaknesses and external Opportunities, Threats. When we do it for ourselves, we see ourselves more practically and are able to identify not only our potential but also our shortcomings! Get a trusted friend or family member to have a look at your SWOT analysis and keep an open mind for any constructive criticism. This enables you to recognise who you truly are in the beginning of a beautiful self love journey!

2. Embrace your shortcomings

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“Acceptance will allow you to embrace your shortcomings very gracefully.”
- Mona Sheth

Next is to accept yourself fully - not just the good or the bad, but your whole self! When you embrace your flaws and weaknesses, you are able to fight your own battles and you will be able to shield yourself from unnecessary external criticisms. You are being true to yourself and not relying on a false sense of self.

3. Take the first step

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“And also whatever is in our control, to work on those things. Whatever you can change about yourself, what you don’t like instead of just saying,” you know what I can’t do anything about it” just take the first step. Just tread on the right path.”
- Inshaa Arora

If you have identified patterns and behaviours that don’t serve you anything good, then ask yourself if you’d want to change something about you? It’s not changing who you are but constructively taking positive steps to a better version of you. Just go for it and take your time.

4. Don’t be afraid to spend time with yourself

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“I would say first take out time to spend with yourself - usually when you don’t love yourself you always are busy, you always want to be distracted, so I would say take out at least half an hour a day to start off to just spend time with yourself. Find something you like to do and just do it. Even that is a form of meditation, just doing something you enjoy for half an hour.”
- Marina Kotwal

How many times have you been to a cafe all by yourself without scrolling on your phone or working on your laptop? How many times have you walked into an art gallery or gone shopping all by yourself? To understand yourself you have to spend time with yourself alone without any distractions. If meditation is not easy, try painting or writing or even cooking. Do what you love doing and do it everyday!

Pro tip: The next weekend you are free, take yourself on a date! You don’t have to even step out for this. You can indulge yourself in your favourite skincare routine and draw yourself a warm bath. Slip into your fanciest pyjamas, light a few scented candles, pick your favourite movie or book!

5. Don’t miss an opportunity to celebrate yourself!

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“When you celebrate your wins, however big or small, you start to become more confident in your ability to pull yourself up. You learn that everything is surmountable. And there’s infinite  potential in you to do anything. And I truly truly truly believe that.”
- Devika Patel

People who reflect and acknowledge their progress, celebrate their smallest of wins are generally less stressed and more optimistic in their ability to take on tasks. When was the last time you said “thank you” or “I am proud of you” to yourself? When you appreciate the little things you achieve and take that time to understand how awesome you are, you are going to be more and more confident in yourself!

Pro tip: Make a list of all your achievements in the last year or month, big and small, it can even be acing a new recipe or winning a pitch. And then, give yourself a pat on the back and say a thank you to yourself for making it happen.

6. Move your body the way you want!

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“Then I think exercising is a part of my journey because I loved it, not because everybody said I have to. But I love it, I love to stay fit; I try my best; I do yoga because I feel it gives you mental peace, and that’s pretty much about self-love for me.”
- Rinila Debnath

Moving your body is very important to keep those energy levels up! After all, emotions are chemicals released from your brain. And moving your body will definitely help release those happy hormones!

Pro tip: If you don’t have a gym membership or access to a yoga class or you are just too lazy to exercise, no problem. We got you! Like dancing? That counts as exercise! Youtube has a billion choreographies, simple workouts and stretches! Pick something new each day!

7. It’s okay to be selfish

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“Sometimes it’s okay to be selfish - I think a lot of time self-love is considered selfish. But I think we can only give to the universe as much as we give to ourselves. Sometimes self-love is just saying no to something you have said yes to in the past.”
- Khushbu Thadani

You should be your number one priority. It’s easy to always put others' needs and happiness before us in the fear of not being able to keep up in a relationship. We don’t realise how we drain ourselves trying to keep up with ‘always being available for a friend’ , ‘ never saying no to extra tasks’ after a full work - packed day. But when you choose yourself, you’ll notice the change in your energy! It is not selfish to choose your happiness.

Pro Tip: Next time say ‘no’ and kindly decline when you don't want to do something! It is tough but give it a try and you’ll see the change in your mental health. It will create that space for you mentally and physically so that you are able to do more of what you want!

8. Be your own best friend :)

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“Close your ears, open your mind, and start that conversation with you before anyone else.”
-Shaan Khanna

When we are in a problem, we always look for a friend or a companion to confide in. But we never think of just having that conversation with ourselves first. Next time try talking to yourself just like you would with a close friend!

Pro tip- More often we tend to complicate our thoughts. In such a situation, whether you are in a fix or trying to figure out some part of yourself, you can always write it down on paper. It does not have to be fancy journals, just a simple mind-map or even bullets will give you more clarity!

This journey is long but very rewarding!

“For starters, just waking up and greeting yourself in the mirror with a joyful smile and I’m so happy to see you today, puts me in a frame of mind that is happy to be alive and looking forward to the day.”  
- Nisha Gupta

There's a beautiful, courageous woman in all of us who can achieve anything she sets her mind to.

This Women's Day, find that woman in you and tell her #ISeeIAmBeautiful!


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